It’s said that we make 35,000 decisions a day. How is that even possible? I guess it starts with should I turn off my alarm or hit snooze, cereal or eggs, which font looks good in this blog post, and so on. But I don’t want to talk about those decisions. I want to talk about the big one. The one that’s holding you back. I don’t know if you can truly find your focus in any other area if you don’t tackle this first.
I had an eighteen-year career that I spent a lot of time complaining about. It stifled my creativity, it belittled my capabilities, and DECIDING to quit was the most freeing, life-changing thing I had done up to that point. But before I made that decision, I was choosing to live in misery. My family had to listen to my grumbling, I played the victim and sang the tune of poor me. Frequently we don’t think there is another option and for a time, I didn’t either. But there is always another option; it just might be hard and some of us like miserable comfort rather than temporary challenges that bring relief. I am no stranger to big decisions. I can tell you they stop progress, they at times, feel like an elephant sitting on my chest. But the relief on the other side of moving forward can be exhilerating.
Often, not to decide, is to decide. Not making decisions has consequences. Not applying for the job you don’t think you’re qualified for. Not responding to the meetup request because you’re sure you won’t hit it off. Not having a hard conversation because you’ve already decided it won’t go well. Missed opportunities cause regret. I would rather say “I have failed” than to say, “I never tried.” As a parent and as a role model, this is an important distinction for me.
I recently read this in an old devotional book that belonged to my mom and it seemed fitting to share.
We only have so much time. And the quality of those days and years are totally dependent on the decisions we make. Never again will we have this hour to live over. When the time comes, we mustn’t be afraid to make any decision in favor of life. The opportunity to decide about right now will not come again.We can either look at this truth and cringe or see it as an opportunity and seize it with gratitude. It is exciting to consider that we can make decisions now, about our lives now, that will enhance our lives forever. (Days of Healing, Days of Joy)
Can you imagine seeing your decisions as opportunities instead of problems? To hire and expand? To fire and start over? To move or to stay? To stop drinking alcohol? To start a fitness training regime? To apply for a grant? To change careers? To end that friendship? To join a singles group? To offer a new service? To invest for retirement? Ask yourself, what is the consequence of deciding? What is the consequence of not?
I don’t know you. I don’t know what decision you face. But if you find yourself unhappy and think there is no other way, if you find yourself stuck, but it hurts to break free, if you can’t move forward until a decision is made—maybe it’s time to decide. You won’t be able to find your focus in other areas if a decision, or indecision, is consuming you.
If this is something you need help with, let’s see if coaching is right for you. Schedule a free 30-min consult by emailing jen@thejenadvantage.com.